*mister mister with a knive in the closet*
june19th,11:46pm>
i am suspicious. i am paranoid. i sit on your shoulders and i pretend that you will carry me to far away places. phuleeze....you have no idea what you are talking about. love you. xoxoxo
*utilise or die*
june19th,11:35pm>
and yes..i am here at my sister's place using her i-mac to update my pitas. yes. i am such a schmuck.but wait...is that me you're talking about? why...if it is..thank you. now i know.
*the sign says applause*
june19th,1:07am>
spent the whole day with my baby. it was a good one, i guess. got a lot of things off my chest. watched tomb raider. my sunshine had to pay for everything cos i'm so broke. thanks baby. i'm pathetic, i know. i'm trying to plan out a scheme to raise money cos oh my gosh, i owe so much but have so little.....2 dollars to be exact.
i will be spending the night at my sister's place later cos i missed her so. you guys take care of yourselves. don't let the bastards get you down.
*in the middle of the streets i say strike a pose*
june18th,1:28am>
had recording today. i guess it went okay. did "outofpockets" and it sounded nice enough. in the middle of the whole thing we had to like take a picture of the whole band and numbness had this whole idea/image of it in her head and so we were trying different ways to make it work. some people kept staring at us thinking we were rockstars. i felt sick at the beginning of the day and wanted to throw up by the time i got to the studio but i guess i got better when we were setting up when it was time to record. the whole band did brilliantly except for me. i'm not a recording kind of guy i guess. each time i stike a chord i will always picture the sound in my head and it'll never turn out to be like what i expected. thanks for not telling me that i sucked.
oh yeah. yesterday was father's day and i think my dad's angry at me cos i wasn't home with the whole family for dinner. dammit.
anyway...i feel like throwing up again. excuse me.
*i know*
june17th,1:41am>
i know nothing. absolutely nothing.
*over lights*
june17th,1:23am>
this picture aches for something else new
perhaps a new love like she who cares for me like no other
more than pavements more than clouds that has our parade
out on streets
let it rain they say i will not succumb to anything but this love
oh don't you hear me or doesn't that sound too much
like something i heard i saw
like i care
why won't you give me your hand and dance the day away into night without sunlight
i will tell you stories on how i got here
yes i can
you will be so entertained
oh my gosh
you will
you don't look at me like i'm special i know
when i'll try too hard to make you think that i care
and i do
oh yes i do but nothing seems to work
you don't ignore me like how you ignore yourself
why can't you just tell me off and i can commit to a better death
i will plan it out so nobody will know that i'm gone
and i'm sure nobody will know that
i'm gone
would you care if i'm gone
you wouldn't miss me when
i'm gone
cos i know you wouldn't think much of me anyway
who am i to you i guess
or you can say i know that you are not going to be able to read this to the fullstop of the
fullstops
you won't know when i'm gone
and so i won't be there anymore cos i know you won't even know that i'm gone
you think you think you think you think you think
it's nice to pull this knive over my wrists watch me watch me goodbye xoxoxo
*heart sinking help*
june17th,1:01am>
my heart is sinking and i have no idea why.
spent the day at y.m.s with sunshine cos she was performing and all. that place gives me bad vibes now. damn. i've got so many questions to ask. i'll be a slave from 11am to 4pm and i'll be recording for marchtwelve after that. i don't have a guitar and i think i'll be using unfall's yamaha. i'm sorry for being such a burden. i think i am. and plus all of us have to come out money for the recording and i have like two dollars and fifty cents in my pocket. yeah. i have no effort and i should die. xoxoxo
*yours and mine are mine and yours alone*
june16th,3:58am>
got home a couple of minutes ago. anyway...today is me and my baby's second month anniversary. it's a big deal for the both of us but you don't really wanna know why and so i won't tell. will be going to that degenderalize show later at y.m.s so i guess that's gonna be cool. yeah.
do you know that you really hate me? no. really. xoxoxo
*making art in a four room jungle*
june16th,3:20am>
"This is a mass bomb attack on the masses that means to us as much as nothing. You have no say in how we run our space and you will never have a say in anything else. As long as this entity exist and as long as we break the rooms over our knees. What shape do you take this place for? We can see nothing but a big square that rides on the shoulders of giants. We are not affected by how much you have to give us because we will take it in and we will spit you out. Like no other, damn right? Damn straight."-dyfectra
*the iron*
june15th,1.09am>
every move i make is like lying through my teeth
and when i hit the bottom up
the clouds will look like knives
i turn around and around and will play that game
is that how we settle the score
back then
i don't even want to know you
even when the trees
were rooted at the edge of this dirt
come on have fun
while i rob the broken from its filth
listen kids
we are the product of an insane plan
a fullproof of a scheme
where these so called prolific writers make their mark
they have money in their back pockets
how else would you explain their graves?
around the world and i'm not coming back again
i have an escape all planned out
i will run as fast as i can
and jump from buildings
to buildings
to space and perhaps beyond
you think?
now that is my excuse
what's yours?
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